3.31.2010

metal-mouth

what irony! it just hit me after watching episodes 16 and 17 of ugly betty. i was so happy for her! (spoiler alert, stop reading if it bugs you)





so yah, i was all happy that she finally got her braces off until i realized that i would be a metal-mouth in less than 24 hours and i'd stay that metal-mouth for a minimum of 6 months. it means meeting new people with braces. it means sitting for job interviews with braces. it kinda takes some getting used to, especially with all the negative vibes and jibes about braces in general.

i'm kinda nervous about it all, now that i'm actually going through with it. first, i get a haircut that came with bangs. BANGS! i haven't had bangs since i was a kid. hG wasn't too happy with the haircut... and then i told him about the braces. man, you should've seen his face. gobsmacked. when he finally found a voice, he asked me what i was trying to do, turn into ugly betty?!

terrible, terrible.

so long, last day of being able to eat nougats and all things sticky! so long, last day of being able to run my tongue over my teeth without lacerating it. hellooo to dorkdom and many more misadventures with food stuck in braces to come!

3.05.2010

counting down to good riddance

dear hypocrite,

thank you for constantly placing me in situations where i have no choice but to be like you. sometimes when i'm lucky, i get away with just keeping quiet. i already constantly evaluate and re-evaluate myself and my performance but because of you, i have stepped it up. i am constantly checking and rechecking my behavior and try to keep it real instead of living in my own little bubble. i really am trying hard to not become like you, so thank you for helping me keep my guard up all this while. i sincerely mean that.

now that we have the mushy part out of the way..

i especially loved it when you bristled with indignation when other people have made a mistake but refused to acknowledge their mistake as you saw it. that's fair enough. generous of you to accept that it's human to make mistakes and you're willing to accept that, but draw the line at not having the balls to own up to one's mistakes. funny that. what about the time when one of your mistakes was pointed out in black and white, and the knee-jerk reaction you had was to screech back asking if it was all your fault now for being in the situation you were faced with.

in the exact words of he-who-must-not-be-named, your notes are exquisite, i might add. bravo! they are so perfect that it takes me twice the time to read your words than it would take me to write my own set of notes. sometimes, i even have to stop and ask for someone more intelligent, or with better eyesight, to decipher your perfect handwriting. the precision of those notes, man! so precise that all you need is the date on your entries - we automagically figure out the time of events somehow, usually by guessing the time based on the entries before and after your notes.

and where do i start with that attitude of yours? i have resigned myself to the fact that you will continue to do what you want, regardless of whether it may be the best for you or not. I admire how you have so quickly adopted and adapted, claiming credit whenever you can. I'm glad you think that will get you places. Maybe it will, but i hope you enjoy your time just as much when you crash and burn. not if, but when.

i really don't mean to wish you harm but you are making it really hard for me to continue harboring any sort of good will towards you. i have lied to myself and made up excuses for you so i could keep giving you second chances but my supply is fast running short. frankly, i'm glad our time will come to an end soon. i don't ever want to see you again. if you keep this up, you will eventually sink and at this point, i would happily sit there next to the pile of lifesavers and watch you thrash about.

so i hope you have a good rest of the year and learn to grow up a little. i know that i definitely have during our short meet, and that the rest of my year will continue to be a huge learning opportunity in the lesson called life.

with blatant disregard,
amy