5.01.2006

mayday

scrambled brains on the first of may
what will be next? my head going gray?
many a surprise crept up to say "boo!"
surely my death cert is not yet due...

i think i pulled a brain cell or two in the past twenty-four hours. apologies for the disjointedness


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i stepped on something that went crunch not 5 minutes ago and now i'm too scared to take a closer look. if you didn't look too hard, it would've passed for the severed leg of a mummified frog. it brought back nightmarish memories. i was seven, in a frilly party dress ready to tackle the roller skating rink rented out by the bdae girl. i came complete with the lacey socks and white mary janes. no, that's not the nightmarish part. i blame my mom for the whole outfit. i blame myself for letting her get me into it. anyway, we were too early for the party so we decided to pay the neighboring aquarium a visit.

blue glowing tanks of water filled with an assortment of fish, bubbling and gurgling... quiet whispers of haggling behind the dark counter near the door. the smell of seaweed and pondscum. the things that capture the attention of a wee li'l seven year old lass... so triumphant a capture that she failed to see one suicidal goldfish plop itself onto the hard grey concrete floor in the line of fire to those shiny white girly shoes. one big fat black goldfish lying quietly there, convinced it was invisible and invincible to all earthly forces. *squuiissshh* a slow and thorough death, i must confess...

18 years later, that very moment still remains etched in my memories.. crystal clear. scarred for life. never have i since entered another aquarium or fish section of a pet shop.

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